Discipline with Love Practice

When the elder son was 3 years old, we did not know how to discipline him. We were very lost and helpless at that time. Without discipline, our eldest son became demanding at that moment. He lacked self-control and discipline.

In order to correct his behaviour and attitude, my husband and I decided to attend parenting course. We discuss and find solution for parenting. We find discipline with love is very helpful for us. It just likes torchlight in the darkness to guide us to the direction.

My husband and I decided to have united stance in our parenting. We adopted an immediate character-based correction to correct the misbehaviour and praise the positive character and attitude. We set up rules and boundaries in our family and follow up with our children. We use a firm but kind approach in our parenting. The following example is an illustration of how the discipline with love work for our familiy.

For example, my elder son threw lego when he could not fix it.

I asked him, “What happened here?”

He told me,” I am angry because I could not fix the lego (stamping his feet).”

I asked him, “I understand you are frustrated because you cannot fix the lego. What is our family rule?”

He looked down and said, ”Cannot throw thing”.

I said, ”I feel sad when you hurt things.”

He told me, ”Mummy, I’m sorry. Please forgive me”.

I said to him, “I love you, but I don’t like the behaviour of throwing things. Then, I gave him a big hug.

I asked him,” What do you need to do now?”

He said ,”I shall pick up the lego”.

I asked him, ”What shall you do when you are frustrated next time?”

He answered, ”Talk to mother”.

Quoting from Parenting with Confidence Workshop, “parents use discipline to teach children appropriate behaviour so that they can operate happily and confidently in the world. Well disciplined children grow up to be sociable, self-disciplined adults.” Discipline with love can build self-esteem of children. They may feel safe and secure with rules and boundaries. On the contrary, without discipline, parents will be helpless and children will be very insecure and may develop low self-esteem. From now on, practise discipline with love, you will become more confident and experience drastic change in the life of your children.